Okay so basically, i NEVER use this,lol. Only when i remember or somethin happens in my life. Sorry to say that my life isn't interesting,lol. Just kidding. So since last time nothing too exciting. Ever since then school was really stressful. As i said once one gets their acceptance letter from college, they feel as if they dont need to do anything else, high school is over. WRONG! one tends to forget that they have to send that final transcript in and if you slacked that BAD then they can DENY you. So i was basically stressed the rest of the school year to bring my grades up. I've never had 2 D's in my whole high school career. So i tried my hardest to bring those up and not so sure i got to my goal of C's but could be a possibility. Prom came around...wasn't the best i have to say. I, myself was nominated as Prom Queen but didn't win, no biggy. I had fun most of the night, BUT untill when i was about to leave, i couldn't find my camera!! Yes, my DIGITAL camera. I knew exactly where i placed it but it was no longer there. Some asshole stole it, so that pretty much ruined my night. Sadly, for me i have NO, NONE, NADA as far as prom pictures. :( Soon after prom was GRADUATION!...although i didn't get a new digital camera, so i could have pics on it BUT dad did take pics with film, so i suppose i should share that with yall. So ofcourse after graduation you have a graduation party. Well let me just say that this is the most stressful thing yet. Simply because my father isn't much of a help. He thinks that all of the party stuff is up to me, and i should have to do everything. EXCUSE ME! I did a lot! Sent out Graduation announcements, if it wern't for this stupid computer it would have been for me to make the DVD invitations for the party, wrote out and addressed the regular invitations (as well as addressing the DVD ones), put nice lil covers over the DVD invitations. I think i've contributed enough. He says that he's had to buy a lot. HELL! give me a credit card and i'll be happy to go out and make a few purchases. What makes it worse is that i had to do all of this during the school year, with none of their help...i think all of that on top of school work is a lot! He thinks im supposed to be callin people askin them to bring stuff, askin them if they comin....okay! i've done some of that , but shit i can't do everything!! This is MY party...for ME...I Graduated. He thinks just because he's gonna be doin a lot of the cookin he's doin everything. Well, i gotta be make close to 6 batches of cookies. I'm gonna have to do the decorations...(which he said he'll end up doin just because he'll think i'll do it wrong)...get over it! You would think that he could throw this ONE party out of only maybe 2 major birthday parties i had in the past 19 years of my life?? But so now, no1 is really talking to anyone in this household because of my fathers reaction on a wedding we went to this past Saturday. He blew up...as usual...over somethin really REALLY stupid and of course i guess i got "smart" when i just asked a question. He must of gotten into it with my mother the next morning, while I'm sleeping...and the next thing i know i try talking to her askin whats wrong and she wont answer me, DAMN! Once again they are BOTH actin really immature. She acts immature because when he does somethin wrong she takes it out on me...not fare on my part....He acts immature because either he's talkin bout me to her sayin she's a bad mother because i do this and that..basically im a HORRIBLE kid, but i'll NEVER hear it from him, HELLA FAKE! ORRRR immature in a way because he's not grown enough to apologize for his unnecessary blow ups. I'm just really fed up with it...seriously!! Idk i just really needed to vent that out...so now I'm bout to take a shower and get outta this retarded ass house and go to the damn doctor and deposit some money, cause God knows i need 2.
Monday, June 04, 2007
Friday, March 02, 2007
2007
So really i havn't written anything at ALL for 2007. Shame i really DO suck at this. Nothing much has happend ever sense the last time i wrote in a entry. I think at the begining of Feb. i got accepted into Columbia College of Chicago, which was a relief! I was stressin about ever since i turned my application in. I had went to a college visit they had set up here in St. Louis and said "Yea, pretty much most of our students that apply get accepted" i was feelin good like im gettin in then they said, "We really focus the acceptance on the essay they send in" that really just shot me down cause i didnt spend so much time on it and not a lot of effort. So, to get that acceptance letter begining with that relieving word "Congratulations" i didn't kno what to do with myself. But ever since then, it has made it harder for me to be concentrated on school!! You think HEY im already into college but they want that final transcript after graduation. O ya that dosnt' help either cause Graduation isnt too far...May 20th, ya. We've already started to plan my Graduation party as well. Im excited because i convenced my mother to have DVD invitations!! O YA! Doing big things! She was worried about the cost of mailing but we really only need to mail the ones that NEED to be mailed. Like Uncle Tyronne and his family, Uncle Floyd in his family and like My Sister and more...Now the theme (even tho i didn't kno u had to have one) i dont kno cause i wanted it to be Toga but mom said no..i mean dad was all for it. Other news...I DYED MY HAIR! Not much of a change just more red of course. I wasnt trying to cause on the box it was lighter brown than what my hair color was...but it turned out just to be more red. Other than that i can't think of any other major news than that. OH! one more thing...My Doctor is an Asshole! So yes, i kno that i need to loose weight and i need to get going on this cause Chicago is going to kick my ass with all that walking im gonna be doing..BUT! That dosnt give my Doctor the right to tell me im not going to be successful with my Career because im fat. Okay first of all im in the room because im sick and i thought i had strep...where did talkin bout my weight come in at? Second, i dont wanna be a model i want to be a Fashion Designer...market worries bout puttin the clothes out there not the way you look. Thirdly, you are not thin and you are my doctor your best interest for me is to be healthy dont worry about if im goin to be successful or not! Okay so i had to vent a lil....but nothing major that you have missed out on. I'll try more often to write.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Long time, No talky
So as you can see im really not good at this, but at least i use it,lol. Well nothing much late since the last post. Umm my Thanksgiving went good. We were really dissapointed cause we made all this food to see that a lot of people didn't even show up. The solution to that was try to give away as much as possible. I know one thing the holidays has been puttn a a hole in my pocket. OH im sure yall have herd of the major Ice Storm we had over here in the STL. That was HORRIBLE! We (ourselves) were out for a good week. What made it worst that it came to the point that we were the only people in the neighborhood that had our power out (or at least it seemed that way,lol). So we gave in and decided to buy a generator since this is the 3rd time that we have had to deal with this.
So other than that I still work at PBK and im enjoying it more and more because im starting to understand more stuff,lol. That damn storm messed up my hours! UGH! so my pay check was not that big,lol. College stuff is goin okay. I decided that im only applying to only 3 colleges. It went down one because The Art Institute of Chicago is trippin. Other than the fact that it cost about 40,000 a yr, they require you to have a Mac. laptop and they dont offer meal plans; They told me that with their fashion program is only a 3 yr program. When i get there im going to be takein just regular art classes and i can take so courses and fashion design: but in that time i would be working on a portfolio for fashion to see if they will even except me into the program. THATS FUCKED UP! That means i'll be paying for a years worth of tuition there (40,000) and then if i dont make it, it was just totally not worth it. So i just decided it's not even worth the effort to apply. But good news the college i really want to go to (Columbia College Chicago) does not require u to have a portfolio and even if u send one they wont even use it as consideration to getting in. So only thing i have to do now is send in the applications and then finish my essay. Which by the way is done but it just needs to be checked by one of the english teachers.
Okay so something interesting and funni was last Friday. So im x-mas shoppin with my cousin and we go to the ghetto mall and i get my daddy's gift and i see my Crush and what not. It was a joyous time up untill we were on our way to the Galley and i had, just HAD to show my cousin my dream house in this private country club neighborhood. So i show it to her and some other ones and i show her this one that my friend says is her dream home. Well a little ways down the street is this little piece of pavement and then a golf course. Now thats where i normally turn around, well considering this ice storm we just had that was ALL ice and i end up to be STUCK! So she was gonna push but she couldn't because everything is ICE. So we're like lets just pull forward and turn around cause its probably just Snow. WRONG! The whole area is nothing but a thick ass sheet of ICE! I am stuck on a fuckin golf course. Im freakin out...i tell her to get behind the wheel so i can push....not working. She goes to one of those rich houses for help...the lady told her to call AAA. Well THANK GOD! i got those cards from All state for situations like this. I just felt sooo bad beceause everyone i talked to asked, "WHY YOU ON A GOLF COURSE??" So finally the tow truck dude come and he is the dumbes M-Fer ever! He's this ghetto ass, white trash lookin cock-eyed son of a bitch! He gets me out a lil then he gets stuck...then gets un-stuck pulls me out. Then this dumbass didn't pull me out all the way. She he leaves and im honkin at his ass. So im like angela get the wheel. I got to push the car the rest of the way. OOOOOOOOOOO i was SOOOO pissed!! I call that fuckin company that i was upset and mad and told them he did not finish his job and i burned a lot of rubber (lie because i think it's fine) etc...I was sooo scared that night. Usually situations like that i call my dad. But knowin him he woulda blown it totally out of proportion. I kno one thing, my arms was killin me, i need to start workin out again,lol.
So thats pretty much it....I need to go and study for this AP Art History test i got 2morrow! BUH BI!
So other than that I still work at PBK and im enjoying it more and more because im starting to understand more stuff,lol. That damn storm messed up my hours! UGH! so my pay check was not that big,lol. College stuff is goin okay. I decided that im only applying to only 3 colleges. It went down one because The Art Institute of Chicago is trippin. Other than the fact that it cost about 40,000 a yr, they require you to have a Mac. laptop and they dont offer meal plans; They told me that with their fashion program is only a 3 yr program. When i get there im going to be takein just regular art classes and i can take so courses and fashion design: but in that time i would be working on a portfolio for fashion to see if they will even except me into the program. THATS FUCKED UP! That means i'll be paying for a years worth of tuition there (40,000) and then if i dont make it, it was just totally not worth it. So i just decided it's not even worth the effort to apply. But good news the college i really want to go to (Columbia College Chicago) does not require u to have a portfolio and even if u send one they wont even use it as consideration to getting in. So only thing i have to do now is send in the applications and then finish my essay. Which by the way is done but it just needs to be checked by one of the english teachers.
Okay so something interesting and funni was last Friday. So im x-mas shoppin with my cousin and we go to the ghetto mall and i get my daddy's gift and i see my Crush and what not. It was a joyous time up untill we were on our way to the Galley and i had, just HAD to show my cousin my dream house in this private country club neighborhood. So i show it to her and some other ones and i show her this one that my friend says is her dream home. Well a little ways down the street is this little piece of pavement and then a golf course. Now thats where i normally turn around, well considering this ice storm we just had that was ALL ice and i end up to be STUCK! So she was gonna push but she couldn't because everything is ICE. So we're like lets just pull forward and turn around cause its probably just Snow. WRONG! The whole area is nothing but a thick ass sheet of ICE! I am stuck on a fuckin golf course. Im freakin out...i tell her to get behind the wheel so i can push....not working. She goes to one of those rich houses for help...the lady told her to call AAA. Well THANK GOD! i got those cards from All state for situations like this. I just felt sooo bad beceause everyone i talked to asked, "WHY YOU ON A GOLF COURSE??" So finally the tow truck dude come and he is the dumbes M-Fer ever! He's this ghetto ass, white trash lookin cock-eyed son of a bitch! He gets me out a lil then he gets stuck...then gets un-stuck pulls me out. Then this dumbass didn't pull me out all the way. She he leaves and im honkin at his ass. So im like angela get the wheel. I got to push the car the rest of the way. OOOOOOOOOOO i was SOOOO pissed!! I call that fuckin company that i was upset and mad and told them he did not finish his job and i burned a lot of rubber (lie because i think it's fine) etc...I was sooo scared that night. Usually situations like that i call my dad. But knowin him he woulda blown it totally out of proportion. I kno one thing, my arms was killin me, i need to start workin out again,lol.
So thats pretty much it....I need to go and study for this AP Art History test i got 2morrow! BUH BI!
Friday, November 17, 2006
So in the 3 weeks time...
So basically nothing much going on in my life lately. Mainly school and work and trying to find some time for fun once and a while. College stuff is going okay i guess...i really need to get more on top of it. I know the earliest Application is due by Jan. 2nd and i still need to write my essay and my portofolio. Honostly i pretty much want to go the Columbia College simply because of the classes offered. But i dont want to be closed minded and be dissapointed in the end. School has been going okay i guess. Senior year grades arn't as good as my Junior year grades but what can ya say...I HAVE SENIORITIS! and im ready to go. O i finally decided what i want to study while in college. I'm going to double major in Fashion Design and Merchandising. Because just majoring in the Design aspect is ify and i want to start makein money ASAP!! Then i want to Minor in the Euentrepenuership program they offer. So i KNO im going to have HELLAZ hw. I just hope my 4 yrs of high school go as fast as when i get to College.
Okay so like i said in the last entry i got a job and now i have 2 jobs: Babysitting and Pottery Barn Kids. PBK is a realy cool place. Just last night was my first actually work day and i catched on pretty quick; considering the training went by fast. Last weekend i went to go see Stranger than Fiction. It was the first movie i've seen in theatre's since June. I really want to go see Happy Feet. I swear when i have a husband and he has niece's and nephew's they're going to think im the coolest Aunt,lol. Because im such the big kid. I can play with anything and get amused by it. Oh the week of the 5th of nov. i threw a b-day party for Erica (BFF) which turned out hilarious. It was the first party we had this year that didn't contain alcahol,lol. But it was hilarious, we ate pizza from Imo's (like no other!!) and then we played charades, DISNEY charades. We played girls against guys and it was soo funni to see the guys try and get the characters right.
Well this weekend is Trying to focus on academic stuff. Get some Drawings done to add to the portfolio and then 2morrow my Cousin Bridget is having a Lite Party for just the girls. Which is sad cause she took my babies to some1's house and i wanted them to be there! O well...
Okay so like i said in the last entry i got a job and now i have 2 jobs: Babysitting and Pottery Barn Kids. PBK is a realy cool place. Just last night was my first actually work day and i catched on pretty quick; considering the training went by fast. Last weekend i went to go see Stranger than Fiction. It was the first movie i've seen in theatre's since June. I really want to go see Happy Feet. I swear when i have a husband and he has niece's and nephew's they're going to think im the coolest Aunt,lol. Because im such the big kid. I can play with anything and get amused by it. Oh the week of the 5th of nov. i threw a b-day party for Erica (BFF) which turned out hilarious. It was the first party we had this year that didn't contain alcahol,lol. But it was hilarious, we ate pizza from Imo's (like no other!!) and then we played charades, DISNEY charades. We played girls against guys and it was soo funni to see the guys try and get the characters right.
Well this weekend is Trying to focus on academic stuff. Get some Drawings done to add to the portfolio and then 2morrow my Cousin Bridget is having a Lite Party for just the girls. Which is sad cause she took my babies to some1's house and i wanted them to be there! O well...
Saturday, October 28, 2006
I really suck at this....
It seems that i can never get in the hang of this blog thing. Actually i was pretty good troughout the summer, but now that school started its maybe a once a month thing,lol!
So i left you off with talkin to my cousin, goin to homecoming etc...Well things with my cousin is great no regrets there trying to work things out with her. Homecoming was AWSOME!!! I loved it, i didnt get to do all that i wanted to do but i still had a blast. There are some pics so if u wanna see feel free to e-mail me and i'll send you some. So lately its been nothing but school work and babysitting. And speaking of WORK, SAMANTHA GOT A JOB!! Yes i kno, bout damn time! I work at Potter Barn Kids (a baby/kid store for rich kids). I start training tomorrow and im pretty excited. So basically ima have 2 incomes comin in,lol. Babysitting and PBK. Only thing im upset about is that she said it was seasonal when i signed up for part-time...ofcourse i said yes, but i just gotta make them LOVE me so i can keep it permanently. My boss is hilarious, she's like the Ditzy blonde who think EVERYTHING is funny.
Today i took the ACT for the 3rd time! It was a BITCH! OMG it was so much harder than usual. So pissed! Im hopin i get a better score even if its by one point! Well, today there is much to do; Go shopping, i've been craving steak(dont ask) so eating, then going to a Pajama Slumber Party,lol! Yes, sounds too young but lets just say that it's an Adult version. Tomorrow im supposed to be going to this Portfolio Viewing thing at Washu. but i never bought one of those portfolio things and i dont wanna be comin up there with my janky ones,lol. So idk, i'll have a chane for at least 1 or 2 university's to critique my work. I've had A LOT to do and still do. I have a whole LIST of things i need to do as far as college's and it starts with my recomendations....which instead of going to the viewing thing 2morrow im going to get all my recs. done so they can get started writting them. I cant wait till after 2nd semester and i've sent all my college stuff cause then it's just chillin then and im going to need it!
OMG! The holidays have been in my mind for a while! I swear if Uncle floyd and his family do not come for either Thanksgiving or X-Mas...Then i better see them at my graduation!!!! And that's for EVERYONE who has the same blood as me!
Well i suppose that concludes my entry...all i can say im going to try and keep up on my entry's...BYE!
So i left you off with talkin to my cousin, goin to homecoming etc...Well things with my cousin is great no regrets there trying to work things out with her. Homecoming was AWSOME!!! I loved it, i didnt get to do all that i wanted to do but i still had a blast. There are some pics so if u wanna see feel free to e-mail me and i'll send you some. So lately its been nothing but school work and babysitting. And speaking of WORK, SAMANTHA GOT A JOB!! Yes i kno, bout damn time! I work at Potter Barn Kids (a baby/kid store for rich kids). I start training tomorrow and im pretty excited. So basically ima have 2 incomes comin in,lol. Babysitting and PBK. Only thing im upset about is that she said it was seasonal when i signed up for part-time...ofcourse i said yes, but i just gotta make them LOVE me so i can keep it permanently. My boss is hilarious, she's like the Ditzy blonde who think EVERYTHING is funny.
Today i took the ACT for the 3rd time! It was a BITCH! OMG it was so much harder than usual. So pissed! Im hopin i get a better score even if its by one point! Well, today there is much to do; Go shopping, i've been craving steak(dont ask) so eating, then going to a Pajama Slumber Party,lol! Yes, sounds too young but lets just say that it's an Adult version. Tomorrow im supposed to be going to this Portfolio Viewing thing at Washu. but i never bought one of those portfolio things and i dont wanna be comin up there with my janky ones,lol. So idk, i'll have a chane for at least 1 or 2 university's to critique my work. I've had A LOT to do and still do. I have a whole LIST of things i need to do as far as college's and it starts with my recomendations....which instead of going to the viewing thing 2morrow im going to get all my recs. done so they can get started writting them. I cant wait till after 2nd semester and i've sent all my college stuff cause then it's just chillin then and im going to need it!
OMG! The holidays have been in my mind for a while! I swear if Uncle floyd and his family do not come for either Thanksgiving or X-Mas...Then i better see them at my graduation!!!! And that's for EVERYONE who has the same blood as me!
Well i suppose that concludes my entry...all i can say im going to try and keep up on my entry's...BYE!
Sunday, October 08, 2006
GEEZ LOUISE!!
I have not written in this thing in hellaz!! I realized how far behind i am in the blogging. I just realized how much i have to catch up with my Sisters blog! So one day this week i need to catch up with her. So where i left off was school and "jerry springer" drama. But things have gotten a bit lighter off my chest. So once my Jerry Springer drama is out the door nothing to worry bout any more. So ironic that once my Sister comments on my last blog stateing that i should just bite the bullet and call her. Right after i read that my cousin pops up on aim we talk it over and the rest is history! Us being on good terms even some what to what it used to be has helped take some stress off of me. I even went bowling with her last weekend for her birthday. That one weekend when i went to that party was pretty great and WILD! LOL
Although, this past weekend has been good and bad. Friday i didn't do much but go with erica to go get somethin done of hers,lol. Then out to get somethin to eat. I was supposed to go shoppin with my cousin but shit happens. Saturday i had to wake up early and go to this job interview( FINALLY!). I leave like 5 min. early...and i get in my car and the freakin battery died. So we have to move it mannually cause i was blockin the truck and then hurry up and drive my ass to the mall. When i get there she's late by like half hour. But we go threw the interview and then she said she's going to call us either monday or tuesday. So im really really hoping i get this job! So then afterwards i go to that stupid rivalry game against clayton that we lost badly 2! I was SOO PISSED! Then we went out to eat and then bowling and then to the loop. So when i get home my parents arnt there and ya. So thats pretty much it....This weekend is HOMECOMING!! Yes ofcourse im takein pictures! No need to worry. Friday i might go see the grudge 2. Who knows. So thats it....
Although, this past weekend has been good and bad. Friday i didn't do much but go with erica to go get somethin done of hers,lol. Then out to get somethin to eat. I was supposed to go shoppin with my cousin but shit happens. Saturday i had to wake up early and go to this job interview( FINALLY!). I leave like 5 min. early...and i get in my car and the freakin battery died. So we have to move it mannually cause i was blockin the truck and then hurry up and drive my ass to the mall. When i get there she's late by like half hour. But we go threw the interview and then she said she's going to call us either monday or tuesday. So im really really hoping i get this job! So then afterwards i go to that stupid rivalry game against clayton that we lost badly 2! I was SOO PISSED! Then we went out to eat and then bowling and then to the loop. So when i get home my parents arnt there and ya. So thats pretty much it....This weekend is HOMECOMING!! Yes ofcourse im takein pictures! No need to worry. Friday i might go see the grudge 2. Who knows. So thats it....
Friday, September 22, 2006
It's been awhile!
So it's been about 50 years since i've been on this thing it seems like! If just been caught up with all shit. I've been really stresse, frustrated and u might say depressed. Last weekend was fun i had a BLAST! Basically going to the football game, Going to the mall with tasha, gus and chris, then to gus's ("suprise") party. But i've also had a lot on my mind lately. Mainly school but also just my common, what i call "Jerry Springer" drama. School in the way of doing well, getting into college etc... We all know i like to go big or go home, and i do NOT want to be a failure at life (one of my bigest fears). I just feel like i've been putting a lot of pressure on myself lately or like i feel at times that i'm not putting enough. Yes i realize that this is my SENIOR year and i should be cuttin back a little and college's really look at your Junior year of high school. I'm just that kind of girl that likes to over due it sometimes. Then as far as colleges i'm kind of split between 2 as of now...Dominican University or Columbia College. They are both located in Chicago it's just i'm really REALLY intrested in the both of them. So for example: If i were to get excepted to both i would i have NO IDEA as to which one i should go to.
Now for the whole "Jerry Springer" drama is just buggin me A LOT lately. Meaning that lately i've been missing my cussin reffusly and i still have that voice if not many (friends and shit) saying that "...but she went out with your ex blah blah blah". At times i just really dont care. Then at times i look at it like this: I miss the old days of us talking on the phone for like 5hrs, comin to my house every other weekend etc...I miss my old cousin who i thought was my best friend, sister w/e not who she is today. I pray to go almost everyday that soon she will come around and everything will go back to what it was. Ever since i've read "her side of the story" on her blog i've wanted to talk to her about it. But considering i think she thinks that me and Gus are out to get her she most likely will NOT answer her phone. Sometimes i get really upset at the fact that she always tries to make things right with her used to be friends before even really putting me into consideration. I just wish one day she'll realize how i really felt during everything and we'll just burst out crying saying we love each other. She thinks that this is over a boy when really it's not. In some ways yes, because HE"S the one who did this and brain washed her ass but it's way past him. Honostly, me and HER diserve better! SHIT! at least some1 with some goals in life! DAMN! All in all i wish it would resolve really soon because the holidays are coming up and thats something we would share togethere ALWAYS and i just dont want to be depressed. So i dont know one day i might write her or i just might wait on her, something else i have to think about.
So this weekend is going to be good. So far tonight i went to the movie night at school. Fell asleep and then went off on this one girl. I thought it was funny. HAHA! 2MORROW! is going to be great! It's a party i got invited to it's like some Super Sweet 16 shit! Not even lieing!! So i'll be back on here to tell wats up on that and of course i'm gonna be bringing a camera. Well i'm REALLY tired and i was going to do some prep beutifying tonight but i'll just do it 2morrow morning...BUH BI!
Now for the whole "Jerry Springer" drama is just buggin me A LOT lately. Meaning that lately i've been missing my cussin reffusly and i still have that voice if not many (friends and shit) saying that "...but she went out with your ex blah blah blah". At times i just really dont care. Then at times i look at it like this: I miss the old days of us talking on the phone for like 5hrs, comin to my house every other weekend etc...I miss my old cousin who i thought was my best friend, sister w/e not who she is today. I pray to go almost everyday that soon she will come around and everything will go back to what it was. Ever since i've read "her side of the story" on her blog i've wanted to talk to her about it. But considering i think she thinks that me and Gus are out to get her she most likely will NOT answer her phone. Sometimes i get really upset at the fact that she always tries to make things right with her used to be friends before even really putting me into consideration. I just wish one day she'll realize how i really felt during everything and we'll just burst out crying saying we love each other. She thinks that this is over a boy when really it's not. In some ways yes, because HE"S the one who did this and brain washed her ass but it's way past him. Honostly, me and HER diserve better! SHIT! at least some1 with some goals in life! DAMN! All in all i wish it would resolve really soon because the holidays are coming up and thats something we would share togethere ALWAYS and i just dont want to be depressed. So i dont know one day i might write her or i just might wait on her, something else i have to think about.
So this weekend is going to be good. So far tonight i went to the movie night at school. Fell asleep and then went off on this one girl. I thought it was funny. HAHA! 2MORROW! is going to be great! It's a party i got invited to it's like some Super Sweet 16 shit! Not even lieing!! So i'll be back on here to tell wats up on that and of course i'm gonna be bringing a camera. Well i'm REALLY tired and i was going to do some prep beutifying tonight but i'll just do it 2morrow morning...BUH BI!
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
break break down....
So this week has be VERY stressful! I swear last night i almost broke down and started crying because i'm so frustrated and stressed. Between classes, college, ACT's, LAASA and other bull shit...i couldn't take it ne more. Classes meaning that My Ap Art History class, AP Studio Art class, Spanish5, Physics is just wearing me out and im getting frustrated easier. I mean AP Studio Art isn't hard it's just i take the class very VERY seriously and i feel like my ideas arn't strong enough. And college cause i found out that i can't go to my college counselour apt. 2morrow because i have a Trig. test 2morrow and i NEED to talk to her. ACT's because i think i could possibly kill myself if i don't do good on this ACT coming up because i've taken twice already and gotten the same damn score! 18! ANNOYING! LAASA because im trying really hard to be organized and a good leader but i think its my fault cause i'm not askin for much help from other people like i think i should. I have a tenency to do that,lol. And just other tiny shit...And ive been so anxious and dieing for friday to get here it make it just as worse!
Because my Weekend is going to be sooo FIRE!! Okay let me give you the Itenerary!
FRIDAY!!
Okay so STRAIGHT after school me, shyra and ciera are going to get our nails done. Well just me and shyra ciera just taggin along. And then they talkin about goin to the club that night so idk if i might tag a long as well...cause i mean i AM 18!! HELLO! But after nails i gotta leave like right away to pick up my mommy from work cause the big truck gotta go in the shop.
SATURDAY!!!!!!!!!!!
OMG! so this is going to be the BEST day! Okay so i kind gotta wake up early because i gotta go all the way to florrisant and drop off my proofs and all that shit and order the actual pictures! Then afterwards i gotta come home drop mom off and probably leave AGAIN to be at the game cause im on the BLUE CREW and i gotta be there early to decorate. So then Supposidly, HOPEFULLY chris and gus are going to the game to! If gus can get out of consessions and chris gets his mom's car. So then they supposed to chyll at my house for a while till tasha gets off work then she's comin over and THEN! Were going to the GALLEY with CARMEN!!! AHHHH I GET TO SEE DAVID!!!! SO EXCITED! So it will probably be a GREAT DAY!
Sunday!!
well after all that excitement Sunday's are my recuperating(sp?!) days and cleaning of course. So most likely i will be on here on Sunday to update you on the weekend plans!! HOLLER!
Because my Weekend is going to be sooo FIRE!! Okay let me give you the Itenerary!
FRIDAY!!
Okay so STRAIGHT after school me, shyra and ciera are going to get our nails done. Well just me and shyra ciera just taggin along. And then they talkin about goin to the club that night so idk if i might tag a long as well...cause i mean i AM 18!! HELLO! But after nails i gotta leave like right away to pick up my mommy from work cause the big truck gotta go in the shop.
SATURDAY!!!!!!!!!!!
OMG! so this is going to be the BEST day! Okay so i kind gotta wake up early because i gotta go all the way to florrisant and drop off my proofs and all that shit and order the actual pictures! Then afterwards i gotta come home drop mom off and probably leave AGAIN to be at the game cause im on the BLUE CREW and i gotta be there early to decorate. So then Supposidly, HOPEFULLY chris and gus are going to the game to! If gus can get out of consessions and chris gets his mom's car. So then they supposed to chyll at my house for a while till tasha gets off work then she's comin over and THEN! Were going to the GALLEY with CARMEN!!! AHHHH I GET TO SEE DAVID!!!! SO EXCITED! So it will probably be a GREAT DAY!
Sunday!!
well after all that excitement Sunday's are my recuperating(sp?!) days and cleaning of course. So most likely i will be on here on Sunday to update you on the weekend plans!! HOLLER!
Sunday, September 10, 2006
In My Mind...
Okay so besides school i've had many things on my mind. And most of them are things that i think i shouldnt let get to me ya kno? People think that im this happy person ALL the time. Just because i'm laughing and smiling all the time. So i may not be totally depressed to stop me from laughing but i'm not as happy as every1 makes me out to be. I'm not saying my life is hell, because i know there are people out there who have it 10X worse than me. I think it's mainly stress, frustration etc...Stress coming from school, running a club at school and trying to find a job. Frustration because of just my life in general. My mind is in about 1000 different places and i can't seem to keep them in their place because i'm constantly forgetting something or w/e the reason may be. The reality of being a senior is hitting me after i had a Senior Metting at my school about College Applications, and at that moment i'm like "Damn, in about less than a year i'm on my own." Its shocking. Im dying for a job that is flexible for me. I need money but i also need time for school and such. All of that just makes me stressed out that at times i dont kno what to do.
OH! before i get to detailed and upsetting lets talk about my weekend! Which by the way was way fun. Friday i had a meeting for LAASA so thats where the stress comes in at. But afterwards Me, Erica, Kelly, Brittany and Tink all went in Erica's car,lol and went to the Football game at Duschene. Which by the way is in St. Charles and i dont kno SHIT about St. Charles. So we Mapquest it....AND DOES NOT HELP! We got lost had to get directions from 4 different people, thought we had the right school but turned out we didn't ....So we didn't get to the school till a hour later. We won duh! Well we had better cause i wasn't bout to get lost and we not win. So then saturday morning/afternoon was spent at the LAASA car wash. WORE ME OUT! I almost had to go off on some children but i was wayyy to exauhsted to say ne thing. After all that me, tasha, Gus and Chris hung out and had a mighty good time. Oh so after all that i drop off Chris and on our way out from leaving him i run over a Racoon! OMG! i felt sooo bad. I almost cried. I mean i kno animals get ran over all the time. But i NEVER ran over an animal. And the feel of it once you do so is horrible! What killed me is afterwards i see in my Rear View Mirror the animal still trying to walk away and try to survive knowing it's going to die because of me. I felt sooo bad! ....We came to the conculsion that the Millz mall officially sux! All these gangsters and shit are up there now. Basically it's like another Northwest Plaza. So all of us are going to the Galley. After we hang at my house next weekend. Today nothing interesting, Sunday's are my lazy days.
So back to what i was saying. Frustrated because i felt that when school would start i wouldn't have time to worry about my Jerry Springer situation. It's still here and not going away in the least bit. I mean i realized it was kind of dumb for me to think she was just going to go away and the drama with it considering she is family. And most likely i'm going to hear about her everytime my uncle calls or when my friends that go to her school come up with something. I get pissed because everytime that i go somewhere with gus she comes up in some way shape or form. Like we was at the mall, they met up with this one girl who is friends with the both of Gus and Angela. And they talk about her and shit...kind of like ruined the moment. Their friend brings up how they shouldn't have so much tension between them at least say hi in the hallways because she dosn't like how friends could be like that when in a year or so there going to be gone. I wanted to come out and say soo badly that it's just as worst for FAMILY to be like this for 8 months! 8 freakin MONTHS!! All because of a dick head and her not thinking things threw. IDK situations like these really make me want to invent a time machine and go back a year ago and i say NO instead of yes. Just some kind of change to where things are NOT like this. I HATE havin this burden on my shoulders. I just hope God one day will make things work out make her realize this situation was totally wrong. Because i always look back at how things were between me and her and how i thought we were as tight as anyone could be. No1 could break us apart, especially no guy. I get upset cause i miss her. At time i want to just call her and say i dont care yall going out i just want us to be like b4. But then i KNOW that i can't do that because she's not going to learn anything by doing that. I mean no1 realized how happy i was when we had that talk and when we hung out. I was estatic(sp?)! Then i feel like dirt truly, because she constantly trying to make things right with gus and becca. I feel like she does NOT care and at times i feel like she just does that because i'd probably be the hardest for her to make up with. I've writtin her many times on Myspace about her side of the story, but her page wouldn't let it go threw. They were very thoughtful too...i wasn't just going off and calling her names. I think the internet is just an excuse cowards who do that because they are too afraid to do it in front of their face. I just want things to change SOO bad! But i know it's all in the hands of god. Because i feel horrible it's been like this for sooo long! W/e who knows i might write her another, might not. But not only is this family thing bothering me it's Relatioships. I feel like i'm never going to be in another relationship again. Not just because i havn't gone on a date or havn't gotten any hollas fa real, just because i feel that in my last relationship was such a screw up im going to be that girl thats going to turn down all guys (even good ones) just because of "his" screw up. I want to be in a relationship, but i NEVER want to go threw that again. I've been cheated on, i've been left and i've been used. But i was NEVER used in a way that i was in my last relationship (if you want to call it a relationship). I just hope the next guy that comes into my life is understanding and patient with me. Idk i just know i'm going to be scared in my next relationship and i dont want to be a burden for whoever it may be. But it's getting late and i'm getting kind of depressed talking about this, So i'm going to bed.
OH! before i get to detailed and upsetting lets talk about my weekend! Which by the way was way fun. Friday i had a meeting for LAASA so thats where the stress comes in at. But afterwards Me, Erica, Kelly, Brittany and Tink all went in Erica's car,lol and went to the Football game at Duschene. Which by the way is in St. Charles and i dont kno SHIT about St. Charles. So we Mapquest it....AND DOES NOT HELP! We got lost had to get directions from 4 different people, thought we had the right school but turned out we didn't ....So we didn't get to the school till a hour later. We won duh! Well we had better cause i wasn't bout to get lost and we not win. So then saturday morning/afternoon was spent at the LAASA car wash. WORE ME OUT! I almost had to go off on some children but i was wayyy to exauhsted to say ne thing. After all that me, tasha, Gus and Chris hung out and had a mighty good time. Oh so after all that i drop off Chris and on our way out from leaving him i run over a Racoon! OMG! i felt sooo bad. I almost cried. I mean i kno animals get ran over all the time. But i NEVER ran over an animal. And the feel of it once you do so is horrible! What killed me is afterwards i see in my Rear View Mirror the animal still trying to walk away and try to survive knowing it's going to die because of me. I felt sooo bad! ....We came to the conculsion that the Millz mall officially sux! All these gangsters and shit are up there now. Basically it's like another Northwest Plaza. So all of us are going to the Galley. After we hang at my house next weekend. Today nothing interesting, Sunday's are my lazy days.
So back to what i was saying. Frustrated because i felt that when school would start i wouldn't have time to worry about my Jerry Springer situation. It's still here and not going away in the least bit. I mean i realized it was kind of dumb for me to think she was just going to go away and the drama with it considering she is family. And most likely i'm going to hear about her everytime my uncle calls or when my friends that go to her school come up with something. I get pissed because everytime that i go somewhere with gus she comes up in some way shape or form. Like we was at the mall, they met up with this one girl who is friends with the both of Gus and Angela. And they talk about her and shit...kind of like ruined the moment. Their friend brings up how they shouldn't have so much tension between them at least say hi in the hallways because she dosn't like how friends could be like that when in a year or so there going to be gone. I wanted to come out and say soo badly that it's just as worst for FAMILY to be like this for 8 months! 8 freakin MONTHS!! All because of a dick head and her not thinking things threw. IDK situations like these really make me want to invent a time machine and go back a year ago and i say NO instead of yes. Just some kind of change to where things are NOT like this. I HATE havin this burden on my shoulders. I just hope God one day will make things work out make her realize this situation was totally wrong. Because i always look back at how things were between me and her and how i thought we were as tight as anyone could be. No1 could break us apart, especially no guy. I get upset cause i miss her. At time i want to just call her and say i dont care yall going out i just want us to be like b4. But then i KNOW that i can't do that because she's not going to learn anything by doing that. I mean no1 realized how happy i was when we had that talk and when we hung out. I was estatic(sp?)! Then i feel like dirt truly, because she constantly trying to make things right with gus and becca. I feel like she does NOT care and at times i feel like she just does that because i'd probably be the hardest for her to make up with. I've writtin her many times on Myspace about her side of the story, but her page wouldn't let it go threw. They were very thoughtful too...i wasn't just going off and calling her names. I think the internet is just an excuse cowards who do that because they are too afraid to do it in front of their face. I just want things to change SOO bad! But i know it's all in the hands of god. Because i feel horrible it's been like this for sooo long! W/e who knows i might write her another, might not. But not only is this family thing bothering me it's Relatioships. I feel like i'm never going to be in another relationship again. Not just because i havn't gone on a date or havn't gotten any hollas fa real, just because i feel that in my last relationship was such a screw up im going to be that girl thats going to turn down all guys (even good ones) just because of "his" screw up. I want to be in a relationship, but i NEVER want to go threw that again. I've been cheated on, i've been left and i've been used. But i was NEVER used in a way that i was in my last relationship (if you want to call it a relationship). I just hope the next guy that comes into my life is understanding and patient with me. Idk i just know i'm going to be scared in my next relationship and i dont want to be a burden for whoever it may be. But it's getting late and i'm getting kind of depressed talking about this, So i'm going to bed.
Monday, September 04, 2006
School, Life, Weekend...ya kno?!
Okay so my 2nd week a school is over and little by little things get better. Although i might be dropping my Physics class because my teacher just left us! Can u believe that?! I mean like the 2nd class i had with her (only the 3rd day of school) and she's not there. In fact she wont be here for a while. So in the mean time there going to replace her with a Biology teacher! Who is one of my fav. teachers, BUT i dont feel comfortable having a biology teacher teaching me physics. So my plans are to drop it and take Advanced Anatomy and Physiology or maybe just drop it completely and dont take a Science class. I dont want my grade to slip because my teacher (who teaches biology) is getting threw to me. But other than that most of my classes are better and better. AP Art History is cool, Spanish 5 isn't too bad and African American Studies 1 is getting harder because of the reading but it's still a fun class to be in.
So about Wednesday or so my mom talked to these people that she payed 700 dollars for to help me with college and stuff, and turns out California could be a location that i might be going to College. Simply because some schools there offer up 2 75% in financial aid and that is GOOODD!!! Along with 2 of the colleges that im interested in at Chicago. One is extremely high and the other is pretty decent. I kno California is a GREAT place to go for what i want to go into (Fashion Design) but it's SOO expensive and i'm extremely far away from my family. Yes i do have family there; My sister and my Uncle floyd. But the idea that my family is half way across the damn country will get to me OFTEN. But theres plus's and minus's to everthing, in the end i still have to get accepted 1st and THEN work out the post. and neg.
So finding a job is a pain in the ass!! I just filled out like 4 or so, and im turning them in after school Wednesday and if i can't then most DEF. thursday. And if i dont get nothing from these 2 i'm gonna be pissed! Saturday i woke up early because i needed to go to the bank to do a few things and then to go pick up my proofs from my Senior Pix...WHICH BY THE WAY LOOK AWSOME!! Even dad, who wasn't up to the idea of spending like 400 dollars on pix, was excited! HAHA! My fav. thing he said was, "Ya kno u might actually be cute" Yall may think it was harsh but u dont kno my dad, it's deffinately a Charles comment,lol. Gustavo invited me to this Opening to Latino's party but i decided not to go. Sunday i didn't do too much of nothing. Cleaning and the rest of the day was chillin. Monday i woke up kind of early, surpisingly. The rest of the day was spent shopping. Came home and Chilled. So now it is 8:23 PM and i need to study for my AP Art History exam tomorrow and read some Spanish. ADIOS!
SAMMY D
So about Wednesday or so my mom talked to these people that she payed 700 dollars for to help me with college and stuff, and turns out California could be a location that i might be going to College. Simply because some schools there offer up 2 75% in financial aid and that is GOOODD!!! Along with 2 of the colleges that im interested in at Chicago. One is extremely high and the other is pretty decent. I kno California is a GREAT place to go for what i want to go into (Fashion Design) but it's SOO expensive and i'm extremely far away from my family. Yes i do have family there; My sister and my Uncle floyd. But the idea that my family is half way across the damn country will get to me OFTEN. But theres plus's and minus's to everthing, in the end i still have to get accepted 1st and THEN work out the post. and neg.
So finding a job is a pain in the ass!! I just filled out like 4 or so, and im turning them in after school Wednesday and if i can't then most DEF. thursday. And if i dont get nothing from these 2 i'm gonna be pissed! Saturday i woke up early because i needed to go to the bank to do a few things and then to go pick up my proofs from my Senior Pix...WHICH BY THE WAY LOOK AWSOME!! Even dad, who wasn't up to the idea of spending like 400 dollars on pix, was excited! HAHA! My fav. thing he said was, "Ya kno u might actually be cute" Yall may think it was harsh but u dont kno my dad, it's deffinately a Charles comment,lol. Gustavo invited me to this Opening to Latino's party but i decided not to go. Sunday i didn't do too much of nothing. Cleaning and the rest of the day was chillin. Monday i woke up kind of early, surpisingly. The rest of the day was spent shopping. Came home and Chilled. So now it is 8:23 PM and i need to study for my AP Art History exam tomorrow and read some Spanish. ADIOS!
SAMMY D
Saturday, August 26, 2006
First Week Of School...SENIOR YEAR!
Well, i think it's been a while since i've written in here. A good 2 weeks or so. Since then i have started school and it's been nothing but HELL! Now you think the first week of school, no problem, its fun no homework right? NO!
First Day
First day of school i was excited a bit on the tired side but excited! My first class is Physics, BORING! There isnt much people i talk to on a daily bases in there. And we get a worksheed on Scientific Notation of which i forgot how to do, UGH! So i was SOO ready to go to my next class which is Spanish 5. Yes ya girl doin it real big! LOL I come in that classroom and it's PACKED! I could tell it was going to be a fun class and so far no complaints. Again another assignment, but nothing too hard. Afterwards, it's AP Art History, yes it is a College Course class. Again it's PACKED! And find out its over enrolled and my teacher is PISSED! But she's funny and once again ANOTHER assignment, long as hell! And since the class is offerd to periods and both are over enrolled; of course mine is the 2nd one and books are running short. I dont get the main textbook that, once again, i need for my HOMEWORK assingment. So on a good note i have Learning Center after that (which is a place just to do hw) were i did my Art History hw (that i wasn't able to finish). So the first day i was VERY overwhelmed.
Second Day
My school goes by a block schedule. Meaning that i have different classes every other day. So first hour i have Trigonometry! O JOY! Math bright and early in the morning! The people in that class i LOVE and the teacher seems pretty cool so far. Once again we have HW! only 15 problems but STILL! Then AC Lab another place that u have the chance to do HW, chill, go to teachers for help etc...After that i have AP Studio Art, yes another AP class. But the AP test in May for this class is just basically A LOT of different art work pieces that i have done. Now since i've taken A LOT of them he recomended that i take the test in May. In addition to that and to help for that test i have to finish 12 art work pieces just for the class. GEEZ!! After that i have African American Studies 1 and i'm gonna love 2. So pretty much Blue day classes (the day b4 are white days) are so fun!
The rest of the week
So pretty much the rest of the week is nothin but hw and sleeping. I've never gotten soo much hw the first week of school in my life. I mean thank got my Physics teacher was absent on Friday. LOL isn't that sad?! And for the weekend i have SOOO much AP Art History HW it's not even funni and i have to finish my idea sheet for AP Studio Art and i'm done with hw. Thank GOD! i have Learning Center cause thats where i finish most of my assignments, if the ADD dosn't get to me,lol. O did i mention like the 3rd or 4th day of school i get sick?! So ya i'm fighting it right now, it's just a cold. Nasty ass kids! I think friday i only got 3 hrs of sleep cause i was soooo conjested, but i took a nap in Physics so it's all good,lol.
This week
So my plans for this week isn't much. Of course go to school, i need to go registar to vote and get my full license. I also need to find in there time to go apply to some jobs at the Galleria cause ya girl need a JOB! So the 1st week of school was stressful but i'm still excited for this year....especially Homecoming which is Oct. 14th, and can u believe im wearing...nvm just have to wait. I think people will be SHOCKED! LOL! So till something interesting...
Sammy D
First Day
First day of school i was excited a bit on the tired side but excited! My first class is Physics, BORING! There isnt much people i talk to on a daily bases in there. And we get a worksheed on Scientific Notation of which i forgot how to do, UGH! So i was SOO ready to go to my next class which is Spanish 5. Yes ya girl doin it real big! LOL I come in that classroom and it's PACKED! I could tell it was going to be a fun class and so far no complaints. Again another assignment, but nothing too hard. Afterwards, it's AP Art History, yes it is a College Course class. Again it's PACKED! And find out its over enrolled and my teacher is PISSED! But she's funny and once again ANOTHER assignment, long as hell! And since the class is offerd to periods and both are over enrolled; of course mine is the 2nd one and books are running short. I dont get the main textbook that, once again, i need for my HOMEWORK assingment. So on a good note i have Learning Center after that (which is a place just to do hw) were i did my Art History hw (that i wasn't able to finish). So the first day i was VERY overwhelmed.
Second Day
My school goes by a block schedule. Meaning that i have different classes every other day. So first hour i have Trigonometry! O JOY! Math bright and early in the morning! The people in that class i LOVE and the teacher seems pretty cool so far. Once again we have HW! only 15 problems but STILL! Then AC Lab another place that u have the chance to do HW, chill, go to teachers for help etc...After that i have AP Studio Art, yes another AP class. But the AP test in May for this class is just basically A LOT of different art work pieces that i have done. Now since i've taken A LOT of them he recomended that i take the test in May. In addition to that and to help for that test i have to finish 12 art work pieces just for the class. GEEZ!! After that i have African American Studies 1 and i'm gonna love 2. So pretty much Blue day classes (the day b4 are white days) are so fun!
The rest of the week
So pretty much the rest of the week is nothin but hw and sleeping. I've never gotten soo much hw the first week of school in my life. I mean thank got my Physics teacher was absent on Friday. LOL isn't that sad?! And for the weekend i have SOOO much AP Art History HW it's not even funni and i have to finish my idea sheet for AP Studio Art and i'm done with hw. Thank GOD! i have Learning Center cause thats where i finish most of my assignments, if the ADD dosn't get to me,lol. O did i mention like the 3rd or 4th day of school i get sick?! So ya i'm fighting it right now, it's just a cold. Nasty ass kids! I think friday i only got 3 hrs of sleep cause i was soooo conjested, but i took a nap in Physics so it's all good,lol.
This week
So my plans for this week isn't much. Of course go to school, i need to go registar to vote and get my full license. I also need to find in there time to go apply to some jobs at the Galleria cause ya girl need a JOB! So the 1st week of school was stressful but i'm still excited for this year....especially Homecoming which is Oct. 14th, and can u believe im wearing...nvm just have to wait. I think people will be SHOCKED! LOL! So till something interesting...
Sammy D
Sunday, August 13, 2006
DA WEEKEND!
Okay so this weekend actually turned out better than i had thought.
Friday
I had to babysitt so i can get some MONEY! After that i took a nap and did about NOTHING for the rest of the day. Because i knew i had to wake up BRIGHT and EARLY the next morning to babysitt again. But that night i did work on my drawing, not comin out how i wanted it 2...but i never really was good at portraits when their not me. It's of my grandmother when she was about in her 30's or 40's i guess. May not look EXACTLY like her but when i draw i sort of put my own twist you could say. Not so much like Picasso, but it's just me. After this, im drawing Gus (lil bro) a Van Gogh. THIS is more me....i do fantastic when it comes to anything BUT pencil,lol. But i really do love all mediums. I used to be obsessed with Charcol, but since i've done that last Van Gogh drawing i did with Oil Pastels, their one of my fav.'s now. With my grandmothers pic is more of an experiment type thing. For my birthday i got all this art supplies of some i've never used b4...So once im done with experiment piece im on to another oil pastel project. BUT i have to get back in to sketching designs and stuff like that, gotta build my profile stricktly on that part. Dont get me wrong i got plenty other stuff, just not much of designs ne more.
Saturday
Most of the day was spend BABYSITTING!!! Ya i was there from 6:40 AM till bout 2:30 PM, CRAZYNESS!! So after that i came home at some lunch and took a shower. I gave tasha a call and chilled for a while. Gustavo called me and i talked to him for about 5 min. or so. Tasha called me back and we decided to go shopping. I bought a new wallet, a belt(that needs to be returned), and a game that i can't play till i get the original one. BUT all in all me and tasha shopping we have nothing BUT a great time. So we went from the Galleria and she saw her cutie at Journey's that supposed to be takeing her out one day, then to wal-mart, then off to the Millz; where i saw my cutie at Journey's as well. I really wanted a chance to talk to him, but it was A LOT of people in there. Odd too, i came in like 15 min. b4 closing so i was upset but HE"S SOOO CUTE! Haha and he's not hispanic...well not that i kno of he looks mixed so who knows!! After all that Me and Tasha decided to have some ice cream, well I decided,lol. And we go to QT on Page and THEN to vaccum out my car at this car wash place. OMG! TOO FUN! While i'm vaccuming i think the vaccum had a thing for me cause it kept suckin up my skirt and shirt...so while that is going on i'm screaming and laughin. And while we are about to leave (didn't cause i almost left the damn mate there,lol) this nice concerned hispanic man, who by the way had NO style, asked if we were okay. I mean if i was over hearing us i'd probably ask if we were okay as well.
Sunday
I have done....NOTHING! today, and i LOVE IT! I havn't even taken a shower yet,lol. But eventually i will. Matter fact i'm gonna go do that. Most likely i'll probably watch a movie wit mi mami and then tonight might do some sketches!! Gotta get ready for college right? Well just in case if i go back to Chicago to Dominican University they might set me up with the fashion professors and look at my stuff. Give some feedback and such...So just in case. Wich reminds me i need to give that recruiter for stl an e-mail cause i need to kno if they are going to charge me for stayin on campus.
So 2morrow i pick up my schedule. There's NO WAY i'm waiting till wednesday. I'm SOO excited for school to start. But as far as the rest of the week idk. I KNO i'll probably be at my lil bro's house a lot to keep him company cause he's getting surgery tuesday. I have to give Diego a bath b4 school starts as well. So the rest of the week i really dont have ne thing planned....knowing me, family and friends something will pop up.
Sammy D
Friday
I had to babysitt so i can get some MONEY! After that i took a nap and did about NOTHING for the rest of the day. Because i knew i had to wake up BRIGHT and EARLY the next morning to babysitt again. But that night i did work on my drawing, not comin out how i wanted it 2...but i never really was good at portraits when their not me. It's of my grandmother when she was about in her 30's or 40's i guess. May not look EXACTLY like her but when i draw i sort of put my own twist you could say. Not so much like Picasso, but it's just me. After this, im drawing Gus (lil bro) a Van Gogh. THIS is more me....i do fantastic when it comes to anything BUT pencil,lol. But i really do love all mediums. I used to be obsessed with Charcol, but since i've done that last Van Gogh drawing i did with Oil Pastels, their one of my fav.'s now. With my grandmothers pic is more of an experiment type thing. For my birthday i got all this art supplies of some i've never used b4...So once im done with experiment piece im on to another oil pastel project. BUT i have to get back in to sketching designs and stuff like that, gotta build my profile stricktly on that part. Dont get me wrong i got plenty other stuff, just not much of designs ne more.
Saturday
Most of the day was spend BABYSITTING!!! Ya i was there from 6:40 AM till bout 2:30 PM, CRAZYNESS!! So after that i came home at some lunch and took a shower. I gave tasha a call and chilled for a while. Gustavo called me and i talked to him for about 5 min. or so. Tasha called me back and we decided to go shopping. I bought a new wallet, a belt(that needs to be returned), and a game that i can't play till i get the original one. BUT all in all me and tasha shopping we have nothing BUT a great time. So we went from the Galleria and she saw her cutie at Journey's that supposed to be takeing her out one day, then to wal-mart, then off to the Millz; where i saw my cutie at Journey's as well. I really wanted a chance to talk to him, but it was A LOT of people in there. Odd too, i came in like 15 min. b4 closing so i was upset but HE"S SOOO CUTE! Haha and he's not hispanic...well not that i kno of he looks mixed so who knows!! After all that Me and Tasha decided to have some ice cream, well I decided,lol. And we go to QT on Page and THEN to vaccum out my car at this car wash place. OMG! TOO FUN! While i'm vaccuming i think the vaccum had a thing for me cause it kept suckin up my skirt and shirt...so while that is going on i'm screaming and laughin. And while we are about to leave (didn't cause i almost left the damn mate there,lol) this nice concerned hispanic man, who by the way had NO style, asked if we were okay. I mean if i was over hearing us i'd probably ask if we were okay as well.
Sunday
I have done....NOTHING! today, and i LOVE IT! I havn't even taken a shower yet,lol. But eventually i will. Matter fact i'm gonna go do that. Most likely i'll probably watch a movie wit mi mami and then tonight might do some sketches!! Gotta get ready for college right? Well just in case if i go back to Chicago to Dominican University they might set me up with the fashion professors and look at my stuff. Give some feedback and such...So just in case. Wich reminds me i need to give that recruiter for stl an e-mail cause i need to kno if they are going to charge me for stayin on campus.
So 2morrow i pick up my schedule. There's NO WAY i'm waiting till wednesday. I'm SOO excited for school to start. But as far as the rest of the week idk. I KNO i'll probably be at my lil bro's house a lot to keep him company cause he's getting surgery tuesday. I have to give Diego a bath b4 school starts as well. So the rest of the week i really dont have ne thing planned....knowing me, family and friends something will pop up.
Sammy D
Thursday, August 10, 2006
6 FLAGS BABY!!!!
Okay so as you kno, yesterday (wednesday), was spent at 6 Flags! If your wondering why i was so excited is because the last time i was there was 8th grade. So bout 4 yrs ago. So it turned out Tasha couldn't come threw because she totally for got that she had 2 doctor appt. So i was really bumed that she couldn't join us and i really wanted to take her to the water park. But it turned out it was me, erica and random. We had some really good times still...I got to ride the new addition to the theme park, the Superman. Man it's really good! But i still get freaked out by it,lol. Your going like 250 feet in the air and you get dropped. What freaks me out is that you're allll the way at the top and your lookin around and enjoying the view, next thing you kno it, YOUR FALLING! Cause your like waiting and waiting and it's this suprise. So after we did the actual park we ate lunch in my car and then headed towards the Hurrican Harbor (the waterpark). Thats when i REALLY got my excercise. When you go on those waterslides and no1 is there your climbing ALLL those stairs all at one time. It's pretty exhausting, and thats when you wish you would have to wait,lol. We went on this toilet bowl lookin thing, i LOVED it even though i was probably the loudest person screaming i still loved it. Well, it turned out that we had to leave early cause it started to thunder and next thing i see lightening so i'm like TIME TO GO! We leave and chill out at the MCdonalds for a lil while, next thing it just bust loose! Then we leave, get caught in trafic and we're home. I had such a BLAST! Im deffinately going again b4 i go to college.
So anyway today i woke up a tad early cause my allergies (it's really been a pain cause it's the ONLY reason why i get up.) I knew i had to wake up sooner or later because i had to take a trip to the school to pay for my parking pass. I can't wait till next week when i get to pick up my schedule!!!! I'm so ready for school to start it's not even funny. I'm ready to see all my friends etc...They probably expecting me to come in that school the first day cryin but i hope i dont,lol. So after i did that lil runnin i was pretty much tired for the rest of the day. I wanted to go to the library to register to vote possibly check out a book, BUT i ended up falling asleep. My allergies really are a pain! So can you believe it? I have no bad news section!!! 2morrow i have to babysitt and wake up at 8 or so i get home at 1. I need to talk to gus to find out witch day are we goin to the hispanic festival downtown; friday or saturday. Cause we go saturday it wont be untill late cause i gota babysitt AGAIN for even longer till 3....o yes ya girl is gonna be gettin some cash, FINALLY! So most likely my weekend will be booked, if we go friday not saturday maybe i could do somethin with tasha...need to, i miss my buddy!
Sammy D!
So anyway today i woke up a tad early cause my allergies (it's really been a pain cause it's the ONLY reason why i get up.) I knew i had to wake up sooner or later because i had to take a trip to the school to pay for my parking pass. I can't wait till next week when i get to pick up my schedule!!!! I'm so ready for school to start it's not even funny. I'm ready to see all my friends etc...They probably expecting me to come in that school the first day cryin but i hope i dont,lol. So after i did that lil runnin i was pretty much tired for the rest of the day. I wanted to go to the library to register to vote possibly check out a book, BUT i ended up falling asleep. My allergies really are a pain! So can you believe it? I have no bad news section!!! 2morrow i have to babysitt and wake up at 8 or so i get home at 1. I need to talk to gus to find out witch day are we goin to the hispanic festival downtown; friday or saturday. Cause we go saturday it wont be untill late cause i gota babysitt AGAIN for even longer till 3....o yes ya girl is gonna be gettin some cash, FINALLY! So most likely my weekend will be booked, if we go friday not saturday maybe i could do somethin with tasha...need to, i miss my buddy!
Sammy D!
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Psychiatric help
Okay i'm really starting to think that this whoolllee situation is putting me in a place i dont like. Im really starting to think i need psychiatric help. Last night was my 2nd dream of my ex attempting to kill me. The first time wasnt such a big deal, i woke up in a cold sweat and thats it. This time i felt as if it was a nightmare...but it seems like somethin i shouldn't be afraid of. I know i was talkin in my sleep cause i was screaming a lot in the dream. Wake up again in a cold sweat and this time i got tears and eventually (not too much later) i'm crying. Now honostly i dont think he'd do something like that, and i'm not afraid of him (at least, thats what i think). To me the dreams mean how hurt, neglected i am from my cousin. Because in both of them she's just there not saying a word to him about him trying to kill me. Like she's just there for the ride, like it's some kind of entertaining thing. Honostly i dont kno what to make out of em. But that dream pretty much ruind my whole day...and i feel/kno that it's not going to be my last. And i just want to kno how to handle them the right way. Cause i havn't had nightmares like that since i was bout 7...and they were some pretty nasty ones.
Okay again....for some good news. Me and my friends for life are goin to 6 flags FINALLY 2morrow! It should be fun as long as it dosn't rain...but knowing us we'll make the fun out of it! I'm sure of it. So thats it! i'm sure once 2morrow is over i'll have a bigger good news section,lol.
Okay again....for some good news. Me and my friends for life are goin to 6 flags FINALLY 2morrow! It should be fun as long as it dosn't rain...but knowing us we'll make the fun out of it! I'm sure of it. So thats it! i'm sure once 2morrow is over i'll have a bigger good news section,lol.
Monday, August 07, 2006
the weekend...
For my weekend, i thought was rather interesting. BUT b4 i go there im gonna start off with the bad news that happend b4 my weekend that, of course, carried threw out the whole weekend. So apparently i was fooled thinking my sister was the only one who reads my blogs, WRONG! My so called cousin (who i dont like to refer her as family) reads them as well. She basically copied my last blog and used it in hers (meaning the font and shit). So when i'm reading her's she finally (after 7 months) comes out and says what "her" side of the story is to this whole ordeal. Her side is simply saying that, "i've had feelings for him, i just didn't know how to tell him. So when i found out they were going out, i was shocked and acted like it was okay." Basically what really happend is that after a while when she introduced him to me he would tell me how he felt for her and i told him to ask her out...apparently she didn't kno what to do and didn't answer him. Her reason that she told me as to why she didn't kno what to say is "i like him i just can't see us going out". I told him this, he's pissed cause he didn't understand why she couldnt tell him this. (as you can see i'm in the middle of all of this) Were talking, and a year ago at this time he asked me out and i said let me thing about it. There were sooo many things that were going threw my mind i didn't kno what to do. Afraid of getting hurt, USED etc...I say yes and she acts happy. At that moment when he asked me i had no where NEAR the feelings that he "claimed" he had for me. So if she woulda told me at that moment i woulda called it off completely! This story of hers is basically frustrating but easily solved....OPEN YOUR MOUTH! If she woulda told me from the get go, NONE of this would've happend. It's frustrating because she's saying that she was hurt during our fake relationship....that now i feel a bit bad but yet i kno i did nothing wrong. How could i do something wrong and be hurting her intentionaly when i couldn't of known? And till today i realize somethin that she SHOULD...does she not know that for him this was all a game??? He got dissed by her, he wanted to piss her off by going out with her cousin (me), breaking up with her cousin, then breaking the family by doing shit that he KNOWS is bad BUT makes it justifyable to her (basically brain washing her). Honostly if a guy needed to do all that i would NOT be impressed if ne thing i would be hurt as well because he had to put me threw pain just to get back my attention. But ofcourse she dosnt see it as long as she has him, and ONLY him, it's all good in her life. Now she does nothing but complain about loosing all her friends...Honey if you make your boyfriend your TOP priority and say that he IS your life....why are you complaining about friends? You got what you want right? I mean during this whole situation some1 PLEZ tell me if i'm wrong or have gone wrong about anything...just tell me! I've done nothing but take people's advice as far as being reasonable and hearing her out and giving her a second chance....not beating her ass, etc...So this whole getting shit back isn't going so good. She tells us we can't go to her house and stop calling her but if she wouldn't act like it's not ours...we wouldn't have to be soo persistant. I dont think she understands that we want this done so that we're DONE, finished with her. With all this, i am probably the only teenager that wants school to start. I will be TOO busy to worry about her, him, immature people...basically just people that stress me out. Funny that my mother keeps saying that one day that light bulb will come on, but honostly i HIGHLY doubt it. I think i've lost alll hope...and my father, well lets just say he got the info. when it initialy happen, but since then....he knows nothing. And im sure he'll be more upset and dissapointed than he was 7 months ago.
SO! on the brighter sides of things! Saturday was VERY interesting. I had my senior pix taken and i had a rather good time doing that. I dont enjoy takein pictures of that nature so i was a bit on the crabby side because of that...BUT i had the most HILARIOUS photographer ever! So he kept me calm. So every1 be on the look out for those, i'm hopin they turn out very nice. I mean shit! My moma gonna be payin like 300 dollars for em so they better! After that i came home and took a nap, knowing that i had to go shopping with natasha. So around 5 ish we went to the Mills and wen't shopping. Actually thats tasha who went shopping cause she got the money and JOB! O since i brought that up...I BETTA GET A DAMN JOB! I applied to 6 places since i've turned 18, so somethin need to happen. So anyways...while we were there, there were sooo many priceless moments! I mean from tasha stumbling over her OWN feet to me slipping from some water on the floor. OMG! and there's this HELLA cute guy that works at journeys...tasha like ruined my chances with him cause she was soo mean to him so he probably thinks im mean 2. So after the mall we went to Gus's house and i met his cousins who are staying for a while from the DR. Margarita, she's soo funni...especially when i'm understanding what she is saying,lol. Then i met his cousin Lili for the first time, and she met me...funni cause she didn't kno who i was at first till gus said something. And basically just chilled and had fun! So my weekend or shall i say just Saturday turned out better than i had thought....cause i mean Sunday i did nothing but the usual, clean and cook. I swear to bob! I thank my parents for teaching me all sorts of things pertaining to being on my own cause i'm SOOO ready for college. I really got my heart set on Dominican...i mean there's only like 3 things i dont like. Having to live on campus for 2 years, the tuition and the freshmen dorms are SOOO small! 2 of those i could get used 2, but the tuition is high...but it REALLY is a good school. The location is great, the ratio to professors to students is Fantastic!, the diversity of ethnicitys is great 2. What really caught my eye is that since im going to major in fashion i could internship with PRADA!! I mean if i went to school here in STL at Lindenwood i'd be like interning for wal-mart. Now dont get me wrong i love the store but thats not where i want to go with my career. Then the other thing that had me sold was that i could study abroad to ITALY!! I mean i'd have to study the language for 2 years...BUT ITALY! (besides i've always wanted to learn Italian). Honostly i just realized that i just want to go to school in the Chicago area because there is soo much more opportunities there than in STL. Well 2morrow i have to babysitt....so i can get some CASH! So till some more interesting topics......
SAMMY D!
SO! on the brighter sides of things! Saturday was VERY interesting. I had my senior pix taken and i had a rather good time doing that. I dont enjoy takein pictures of that nature so i was a bit on the crabby side because of that...BUT i had the most HILARIOUS photographer ever! So he kept me calm. So every1 be on the look out for those, i'm hopin they turn out very nice. I mean shit! My moma gonna be payin like 300 dollars for em so they better! After that i came home and took a nap, knowing that i had to go shopping with natasha. So around 5 ish we went to the Mills and wen't shopping. Actually thats tasha who went shopping cause she got the money and JOB! O since i brought that up...I BETTA GET A DAMN JOB! I applied to 6 places since i've turned 18, so somethin need to happen. So anyways...while we were there, there were sooo many priceless moments! I mean from tasha stumbling over her OWN feet to me slipping from some water on the floor. OMG! and there's this HELLA cute guy that works at journeys...tasha like ruined my chances with him cause she was soo mean to him so he probably thinks im mean 2. So after the mall we went to Gus's house and i met his cousins who are staying for a while from the DR. Margarita, she's soo funni...especially when i'm understanding what she is saying,lol. Then i met his cousin Lili for the first time, and she met me...funni cause she didn't kno who i was at first till gus said something. And basically just chilled and had fun! So my weekend or shall i say just Saturday turned out better than i had thought....cause i mean Sunday i did nothing but the usual, clean and cook. I swear to bob! I thank my parents for teaching me all sorts of things pertaining to being on my own cause i'm SOOO ready for college. I really got my heart set on Dominican...i mean there's only like 3 things i dont like. Having to live on campus for 2 years, the tuition and the freshmen dorms are SOOO small! 2 of those i could get used 2, but the tuition is high...but it REALLY is a good school. The location is great, the ratio to professors to students is Fantastic!, the diversity of ethnicitys is great 2. What really caught my eye is that since im going to major in fashion i could internship with PRADA!! I mean if i went to school here in STL at Lindenwood i'd be like interning for wal-mart. Now dont get me wrong i love the store but thats not where i want to go with my career. Then the other thing that had me sold was that i could study abroad to ITALY!! I mean i'd have to study the language for 2 years...BUT ITALY! (besides i've always wanted to learn Italian). Honostly i just realized that i just want to go to school in the Chicago area because there is soo much more opportunities there than in STL. Well 2morrow i have to babysitt....so i can get some CASH! So till some more interesting topics......
SAMMY D!
Thursday, August 03, 2006
*Sigh*
So i'm just pretty much fed up. This girl (ex cousin) just keeps agravating me continuously non stop. I mean she has the nerve to call me and Gus(lil bro) immature when all we do is go to her house and get the stuff that she has of ours...he leaves a message on her celly askin when is a good time for us to pick it up. Now he might of been a little immature when he called her a name...BUT she's actin like its HER stuff and she ain't given it back. I mean is it so hard? I want my games, movies and such i have little cousins who ask me where all my games have gone and i gotta say i dont have them as of now. Now since she went to that level calling us immature ofcourse gus has to retaliate and leaves her a more inappropiate message. If it were me i wouldn't but this is him we're talking about. And she makes this comment thinking that i think her cousins like me...NEVER have i said that while this has gone down. So she's basically just comin up with random shit. So to get this over with im going to get my shit wheather she likes it or not. I mean more and likely i WILL prolly say some shit to get it off my chest cause that is what i need. For her to go off calling us immature she can't even be MATURE and communicate with me and say i give up...no she blocks me on everything, no more calls and just leaves it at that. O YA! thats REAL mature! So when this transaction takes place she better be ready cause i have A LOT to say...most of it will be real, some not so nice but i've just been REALLY hurt and telling other people dosn't help....it NEEDS to be her. So most likely tonight I will be the one leaving a message, i mean if I have to stoop down to her level and do it threw the internet i will....cause damn, i miss my sims game fa real! I think this is the main reason why i want school to start SOOOO bad...cause i'm going to be SOO busy this year that i wont have time to deal with this. And as sooon as it starts the sooner i graduate and the sooner i get out of here and i'm in Chicago.
Okay so for now i'm done...who knows if i need to let out some more frustration later....so be on the look out,lol
Okay so for now i'm done...who knows if i need to let out some more frustration later....so be on the look out,lol
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
THE BIG 1-8!!!
Yes...i am finally 18 yrs old!! It's kind of all overwhelming that i'm really an ADULT now and i'm so much closer to being on my own. To me i don't really have a problem with growing up as much as other teenagers my age. Yes we all want to stay young and not have the responsibilities but it has to happen regardless if you want to stay young. In my opinion it's best to start early so that way i'm not totaly clueless as i get older. I have way to many goals to sit here and be a kid my whole life, i just can't let it happen. So as you might now i went to Chi-town as a 18th gift...but a day was spent at Dominican University to kno more about it. And i REALLY want to go to that school...there is soo many opportunities there in chicago for me to be a fashion designer and that school is also strong in other areas as well. The next day was basically bein spent bitching and sweating and walking. We took their subway downtown cause i wanted to go to their Millinium Park and just me and my moma did NOT get along that day. We got lost sooo many times it was just frustration takeing over us. The next day i was official 18 years old and we had plans to go to their Aquarium and this Pier of thiers. Again we got lost and lost like a hour...when all we had to do is walk 2 block instead of like 10 to get to this free trolly that drops you right in front of the aquarium. So since our time was spent on being lost....we didn't have time to go to the pier cause the trolly stopped at 5:30 and it was no way we was doing all that walking from the subway. BUT while i was down there i saw me some pretty fine ass guys and a number of bums. I've NEVER seen bums like that. But i guess you could i say i had a good time. I'm thinkin of going back up there during the school year to stay in their dorms and observe their classes. But just by myself cause the parents was just too much that weekend.
So when i get back i hear this rumor that my so called cuzzin is pregnant. I really find it hard to believe. But then i kno she is dumb and prolly has un protected sex. I mean isn't that sooo fucked up i mean my own cuzzin could be pregnant by my ex who i lost my v-card 2. Thats that jerry springer shit fa real. I mean if she is....im not gonna say it dosn't bother me cause it does. But not by the fact that she too young and shit....just the fact that it's by the same guy. OMG i had the most freakiest dream last night bout that ex. Since he's like this drug dealing gangster....in the dream he was with his brother and they was actin all cool with me and i play along not to be a bitch and then i say why yall bein like this danni you act like ain't nothin happen, what you want? And he asks me to do somethin with drug dealing and i'm like NO! and they turn around and they pull out these guns on me. That dream was soooo scary. But ne ways....me and my bro stop by her house to get our shit and she ends up not being there, so he left a message. I find out by reading HER blog....that she thinks were immature. R U SERIOUS?!?! I mean were not like her who has to do everything by interenet....we went to her house and then called her, like normal mature people. Grow up and stop hiding behind the internet. I mean she went straight back to her old ways...she sayin that she got a tru side of the story. I'm sorry she's not the victim and i pretty much almost everything saved that happend since she has to do everything on the internet...i'm not stupid i'm gonna document it and save it for future refrence. She's back to thinkin that she has done NOTHING wrong...like she made it worse by giving up on her 2nd chance and not coming to me about it.
Honostly i'll be happy when i leave this city...and not to seem like i NEED a man in my life, i just want one now. A true one, to 4 get about the last. You kno how when it seems like u lost your "love" of your life you feel like you cant look back to ne thing else but that relationship. And i'm tired of looking back to that knowing it was fake. It's hard looking back at the holding hands and shit knowing it was nothing but a game and fakeness. It hurts really bad when during that relationship ur thinking its sooo true and enjoying it....you look back at it thinking it was good times but u have that voice to remind you that it wasnt real. I'm sure i'll find someone WAYY better than him and maybe the one....but 7 months of these thoughts going threw my head it makes it harder and i try to be positive but sometims i get soo depresed. Idk....i guess i just have to deal.....
So till next time i have to get some things out or some more news....
~Sammy D
So when i get back i hear this rumor that my so called cuzzin is pregnant. I really find it hard to believe. But then i kno she is dumb and prolly has un protected sex. I mean isn't that sooo fucked up i mean my own cuzzin could be pregnant by my ex who i lost my v-card 2. Thats that jerry springer shit fa real. I mean if she is....im not gonna say it dosn't bother me cause it does. But not by the fact that she too young and shit....just the fact that it's by the same guy. OMG i had the most freakiest dream last night bout that ex. Since he's like this drug dealing gangster....in the dream he was with his brother and they was actin all cool with me and i play along not to be a bitch and then i say why yall bein like this danni you act like ain't nothin happen, what you want? And he asks me to do somethin with drug dealing and i'm like NO! and they turn around and they pull out these guns on me. That dream was soooo scary. But ne ways....me and my bro stop by her house to get our shit and she ends up not being there, so he left a message. I find out by reading HER blog....that she thinks were immature. R U SERIOUS?!?! I mean were not like her who has to do everything by interenet....we went to her house and then called her, like normal mature people. Grow up and stop hiding behind the internet. I mean she went straight back to her old ways...she sayin that she got a tru side of the story. I'm sorry she's not the victim and i pretty much almost everything saved that happend since she has to do everything on the internet...i'm not stupid i'm gonna document it and save it for future refrence. She's back to thinkin that she has done NOTHING wrong...like she made it worse by giving up on her 2nd chance and not coming to me about it.
Honostly i'll be happy when i leave this city...and not to seem like i NEED a man in my life, i just want one now. A true one, to 4 get about the last. You kno how when it seems like u lost your "love" of your life you feel like you cant look back to ne thing else but that relationship. And i'm tired of looking back to that knowing it was fake. It's hard looking back at the holding hands and shit knowing it was nothing but a game and fakeness. It hurts really bad when during that relationship ur thinking its sooo true and enjoying it....you look back at it thinking it was good times but u have that voice to remind you that it wasnt real. I'm sure i'll find someone WAYY better than him and maybe the one....but 7 months of these thoughts going threw my head it makes it harder and i try to be positive but sometims i get soo depresed. Idk....i guess i just have to deal.....
So till next time i have to get some things out or some more news....
~Sammy D
Saturday, July 22, 2006
BLACK OUT!!
okay....again sry for not writting. BUT! if u havn't herd STL had this big ass black out wednesday and then another storm came rollin in Friday makein the liste of gettin electricity even LONGER! So ofcourse i got my power back (thank god!) and i'm LUVIN it! So ever since my last entry nothing too exciting has happend. I'm done with summer school and passed that stupid computer course with a "A"! O YES! Now my priority is just getting ready for this trip to Chi-Town, Look for a job and get more in the habbit of going to the gym. So too much is on my plate right now....i gotta start getting ready for school, since i am president for this one club i gotta get that organized as well. So i guess u could say i got some shit on my plate,lol. I got my senior pix comin up, which i'm hopin turn out GREAT! I'm not havin my moma pay 300 dollas and they look like shit! OOOOOOO I'M TURNIN 18 IN LIKE 7 DAYSS!!! thats right BE happy! So nothin much so far....Just that DUMBass Black out.....SO YA! Till then........
Sammy D!
Sammy D!
Monday, July 17, 2006
WOW!!!
LO SIENTO!! (i'm sorry!) I havn't wrote in this thing in ages! Either i'm just too busy, don't feel like it, or w/e the reason may be. TRUST! from the last entry there is SOOOO much that has been happening!!! So where i left you off at was those damn ACT's...damn it! I got the same damn grade i got the 1st time i took it. It's really not fare for me cause i've ALWAYS been a bad test taker. I mean when that man called 5 mins. i swear i jumped every single time. So i'm hopin the next time,which i think is in OCT., i do better,lol. OOOO this time i took the writting portion....I KILLED IT! their comments wrote "Your essay adequately supported general statements with specific reasons, examples, and details." So for me i thought it was good....now if i could only remember what i had to write about...DAMN IT!
So i should probably talk about this so called "cousin" of mine. So that Wednesday i went to the park to talk things out with her. At first i'm listening seeing how "sorry" she felt and w/e. And i'm like okay well she said sorry so we gettin somewhere. My main goal was tryin to be open minded, forgiving, and not the Mad black woman (taken advise from the big sis). So i was tellin her that i understand u feel sorry and regret...but things arn't going to go back to the ways that it was b4. I made it clear to her about that. And i also told her that i can't see myself going places with her and talkin on the phone for over 4 hrs....untill they break up. Now i didn't tell her to break up...just in a secretive way i guess,lol. But it's true....like how the hell am i gonna be able to try and make things right with you and give you your second chance if you still goin out with that low life bum ass MF'er who calls himself a man. Thats a slap in my face sayin that he is more important than me and he shouldn't cause i'm her damn family!....So she starts tellin me how she can't see herself wit danny no more cause they argue everyday and shit. THEN! she tell me how he told her to choose between him and her friends/family. I"M LIKE NO THE HELL HE DIDN"T!....O by the way while i was there gus(lil bro) wanted to be there to make sure i wouldn't beat her ass.....so after we talked we all played v-ball and ya...
So like a week or two after that she tells me that they broke up. And she sittin there on AIM expectin me to be all nice to her about it and be there for her for it....WHY THE HELL WOULD I DO THAT! I mean yes back then when she would break up with the guy i was there for her no doubt! ....but this is completely different. And then she kinda pisses me off some more talkin bout "i know it's not ur fault but like ever since all this shit happend gus dosn't want to hang out with me ne more." And i just sit there and say okay...and se was like well thats somthing that i guess i should talk to him about. So then the weekend b4 the 4th weekend she invites me to go to this hispanic festival....i'm like this will be soo awkward but hey! gotta start somewhere right? We go have a good time and such. The day after i invite her to go to my family's big fish fry thing we was havin the day of the 4th. But like after a week i dont' hear a damn word from her, never see her online, and she no longer had me as a friend on myspace. I'm like well this is some odd shit.
SO! i do my experimenting....and i go on her cousins page and she's left her some comment thingys. One in praticular says o can i go out with you kno who tonight instead of you cause when we get back he gonna be gone and i'ma miss him. I'm like this girl think she slick! After all this shit has gone down she dont think no1 is gonna kno who she talkin bout! So then i got on the dick heads page and she writtin him shit sayin she miss him and w/e....So i tell gus and he's all like hell naw! and he calls her and either she lies or dosn't answer his questions......and so basically this longates(sp?)...and on her blog she talkin bout people bein in her buzziness and leave her alone and shit. (girl plez! if you didn't advertize you business like you WANT people to kno you wouldn't have to worry about it!) Gus sees it and he's like she betta not be talkin bout me! Calls her again and asks her ALLL questions that either you KNOW she's lieing about or just wont answer them. So he asks her why she hasn't talked to me....This bitch talkin bout i know things wont go back to being the same so i give up. Gus is like "hold up, your cousin has given you a second chance; she hasn't given up on you...but your given up on her!?" GO LIL BRO!!! He is soooo right....ofcourse she dosn't say ne thing. So she asks them if they gonna stay friends and he's like let me get back to you on that....and she's like i wanna kno now! This girl is buggin out fa real! Like you can tell that she is soooo afraid of loosing everyone so dear to her. She's one of them girls who feels she has to have a boy in her life....cause she says she can't live without him. SAD! O SO SAD! So i've deffinately given up on her since she has given up on me....i no longer claim her as my family because if she was my so called "family/cousin" they dont do shit like this to each other! So for a while now i've been wanting to beat the shit outta her and HIM! just to give her lil reality check. And i could careless if her daddy get mad at me cause i go off on him 2!
So ne ways!!....back to somethin good. For my birthday this year....the BIG 1-8!...i'm goin to Chi-Town for my b-day but also to check Dominican University...where i really want to go now! Cause i look back and see how home sick i used to be and realize i don't think i could do Florida and Georgia. I'm excited to turn this age because so much comes with it; Voting, Credit Cards, Full License, JOBS!!! Cause i am SOOO broke right now it's not even funny! If yall readin this and wonderin wat to get me for my b-day and thats MONEY! LOL!
I'm in summer school right now...(Last week, last say is the 21st!! MY SIS's B-day! wow i wonder how old she gonna be?!?! I think it's like 33 or 34)...This computer class that i HAVE to take or else i dont graduate. And thats something that hits me in the face everyday...i'm gonna be a senior this year...and then....i'm gone. It's just sooo unreal!
But i think i pretty much got all caught up with everything....i'ma try harder to write in this more often to keep yall posted on wats goin on....so untill something interesting
`Sammy!
So i should probably talk about this so called "cousin" of mine. So that Wednesday i went to the park to talk things out with her. At first i'm listening seeing how "sorry" she felt and w/e. And i'm like okay well she said sorry so we gettin somewhere. My main goal was tryin to be open minded, forgiving, and not the Mad black woman (taken advise from the big sis). So i was tellin her that i understand u feel sorry and regret...but things arn't going to go back to the ways that it was b4. I made it clear to her about that. And i also told her that i can't see myself going places with her and talkin on the phone for over 4 hrs....untill they break up. Now i didn't tell her to break up...just in a secretive way i guess,lol. But it's true....like how the hell am i gonna be able to try and make things right with you and give you your second chance if you still goin out with that low life bum ass MF'er who calls himself a man. Thats a slap in my face sayin that he is more important than me and he shouldn't cause i'm her damn family!....So she starts tellin me how she can't see herself wit danny no more cause they argue everyday and shit. THEN! she tell me how he told her to choose between him and her friends/family. I"M LIKE NO THE HELL HE DIDN"T!....O by the way while i was there gus(lil bro) wanted to be there to make sure i wouldn't beat her ass.....so after we talked we all played v-ball and ya...
So like a week or two after that she tells me that they broke up. And she sittin there on AIM expectin me to be all nice to her about it and be there for her for it....WHY THE HELL WOULD I DO THAT! I mean yes back then when she would break up with the guy i was there for her no doubt! ....but this is completely different. And then she kinda pisses me off some more talkin bout "i know it's not ur fault but like ever since all this shit happend gus dosn't want to hang out with me ne more." And i just sit there and say okay...and se was like well thats somthing that i guess i should talk to him about. So then the weekend b4 the 4th weekend she invites me to go to this hispanic festival....i'm like this will be soo awkward but hey! gotta start somewhere right? We go have a good time and such. The day after i invite her to go to my family's big fish fry thing we was havin the day of the 4th. But like after a week i dont' hear a damn word from her, never see her online, and she no longer had me as a friend on myspace. I'm like well this is some odd shit.
SO! i do my experimenting....and i go on her cousins page and she's left her some comment thingys. One in praticular says o can i go out with you kno who tonight instead of you cause when we get back he gonna be gone and i'ma miss him. I'm like this girl think she slick! After all this shit has gone down she dont think no1 is gonna kno who she talkin bout! So then i got on the dick heads page and she writtin him shit sayin she miss him and w/e....So i tell gus and he's all like hell naw! and he calls her and either she lies or dosn't answer his questions......and so basically this longates(sp?)...and on her blog she talkin bout people bein in her buzziness and leave her alone and shit. (girl plez! if you didn't advertize you business like you WANT people to kno you wouldn't have to worry about it!) Gus sees it and he's like she betta not be talkin bout me! Calls her again and asks her ALLL questions that either you KNOW she's lieing about or just wont answer them. So he asks her why she hasn't talked to me....This bitch talkin bout i know things wont go back to being the same so i give up. Gus is like "hold up, your cousin has given you a second chance; she hasn't given up on you...but your given up on her!?" GO LIL BRO!!! He is soooo right....ofcourse she dosn't say ne thing. So she asks them if they gonna stay friends and he's like let me get back to you on that....and she's like i wanna kno now! This girl is buggin out fa real! Like you can tell that she is soooo afraid of loosing everyone so dear to her. She's one of them girls who feels she has to have a boy in her life....cause she says she can't live without him. SAD! O SO SAD! So i've deffinately given up on her since she has given up on me....i no longer claim her as my family because if she was my so called "family/cousin" they dont do shit like this to each other! So for a while now i've been wanting to beat the shit outta her and HIM! just to give her lil reality check. And i could careless if her daddy get mad at me cause i go off on him 2!
So ne ways!!....back to somethin good. For my birthday this year....the BIG 1-8!...i'm goin to Chi-Town for my b-day but also to check Dominican University...where i really want to go now! Cause i look back and see how home sick i used to be and realize i don't think i could do Florida and Georgia. I'm excited to turn this age because so much comes with it; Voting, Credit Cards, Full License, JOBS!!! Cause i am SOOO broke right now it's not even funny! If yall readin this and wonderin wat to get me for my b-day and thats MONEY! LOL!
I'm in summer school right now...(Last week, last say is the 21st!! MY SIS's B-day! wow i wonder how old she gonna be?!?! I think it's like 33 or 34)...This computer class that i HAVE to take or else i dont graduate. And thats something that hits me in the face everyday...i'm gonna be a senior this year...and then....i'm gone. It's just sooo unreal!
But i think i pretty much got all caught up with everything....i'ma try harder to write in this more often to keep yall posted on wats goin on....so untill something interesting
`Sammy!
Friday, June 09, 2006
For this week's stories.....
Okay so For this week was a rather fun but painful frustrating week!
~~Monday....
Did nothing but chyll and be a lazy ass....he it was my first day from my crazy weekend and my first OFFICIAL day of summer break.
~~Tuesday...
I went to Gus's new house...it's sooo cute! and reall nice!LOL! I was there for pretty much the whole day. I was probably in my most pain of my foot. Ya it's been like this for over a week (tuesday was a week). Idk wat's wrong...i woke up for a nap and BAM! my arch of my foot and ankle hurt like hell! So We chylled at his house and did some runnin around...went to Latinos for like dinner. After that we went to Dair Queen for ice cream and went to Koch park to play v-ball. Probably not the smartest thing to do considering my foot but hey it's my fav. sport! Well i put myself in more pain cause me and gus decided to sneak off and leave Erica and Tasha...so i'm runnin to car (more like leapin and runnin) and i trip over the bar that u park ur car at....Fell HELLA HARD! In front of a bunch of people 2. So i scraped up my hands a bit and both of my knees hurt like hell. I ended up havin erica drive us back to gus's.
~~~Wednesday
I pretty much slept most of the day,lol. Untill like 8 at night i did a practice math test for the ACT's. and watched Last Holiday. It was funni and good i dont' like Queen Latifa ne more cause she got to kiss LL Cool J! JK! i still love her! My math section turned out really good i scored a 21 on it and last time fa real i got a 18 so i was happy about that.
~~~Thursday
I did a practice reading and english section of the PACT. I scored one point better on the reading, 17 and the english i KILLED! i gotta 23 and b4 i gotta 18!! O YES!!! And i also got my report card as well and did good. I got a 3.3 for the quater and my cumm. is now a 3.1. O YES! So i was pretty happy with myself that day.
~~~Today
So today turned out rather bad. My so called cuzzin wrote me a message 2day...i'm like NOW WHAT?! Saying all bull shit to me. But supposidly i'm supposed to meet her sometime and work all this out. I'ma try but TRUST! i will be on here to share how it goes. I took the science section today and got like a 16!! I was upset considering when i took it fa real i gotta 19...but to me reading and science i have to be able to mark on and and underline etc...Considering this was a CD-Rom i don't get that chance. So i feel i'll do good 2morrow morning at 8 am!!!!
So my spectations for this weekend is to take this damn ACT and do well...Do something fun considering its one my friends b-day Sat....and possible go shopping. SO i'm gonna go watch television till my mother comes home so i can tell her about the slut...and maybe go do something with her....untill next time
Love your one and ONLY,
Samantha!
~~Monday....
Did nothing but chyll and be a lazy ass....he it was my first day from my crazy weekend and my first OFFICIAL day of summer break.
~~Tuesday...
I went to Gus's new house...it's sooo cute! and reall nice!LOL! I was there for pretty much the whole day. I was probably in my most pain of my foot. Ya it's been like this for over a week (tuesday was a week). Idk wat's wrong...i woke up for a nap and BAM! my arch of my foot and ankle hurt like hell! So We chylled at his house and did some runnin around...went to Latinos for like dinner. After that we went to Dair Queen for ice cream and went to Koch park to play v-ball. Probably not the smartest thing to do considering my foot but hey it's my fav. sport! Well i put myself in more pain cause me and gus decided to sneak off and leave Erica and Tasha...so i'm runnin to car (more like leapin and runnin) and i trip over the bar that u park ur car at....Fell HELLA HARD! In front of a bunch of people 2. So i scraped up my hands a bit and both of my knees hurt like hell. I ended up havin erica drive us back to gus's.
~~~Wednesday
I pretty much slept most of the day,lol. Untill like 8 at night i did a practice math test for the ACT's. and watched Last Holiday. It was funni and good i dont' like Queen Latifa ne more cause she got to kiss LL Cool J! JK! i still love her! My math section turned out really good i scored a 21 on it and last time fa real i got a 18 so i was happy about that.
~~~Thursday
I did a practice reading and english section of the PACT. I scored one point better on the reading, 17 and the english i KILLED! i gotta 23 and b4 i gotta 18!! O YES!!! And i also got my report card as well and did good. I got a 3.3 for the quater and my cumm. is now a 3.1. O YES! So i was pretty happy with myself that day.
~~~Today
So today turned out rather bad. My so called cuzzin wrote me a message 2day...i'm like NOW WHAT?! Saying all bull shit to me. But supposidly i'm supposed to meet her sometime and work all this out. I'ma try but TRUST! i will be on here to share how it goes. I took the science section today and got like a 16!! I was upset considering when i took it fa real i gotta 19...but to me reading and science i have to be able to mark on and and underline etc...Considering this was a CD-Rom i don't get that chance. So i feel i'll do good 2morrow morning at 8 am!!!!
So my spectations for this weekend is to take this damn ACT and do well...Do something fun considering its one my friends b-day Sat....and possible go shopping. SO i'm gonna go watch television till my mother comes home so i can tell her about the slut...and maybe go do something with her....untill next time
Love your one and ONLY,
Samantha!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)